Somewhere Over the Rainbow: Not Every Rainbow After Loss is a Baby

I have always loved Somewhere Over the Rainbow. I’d probably choose it as my life’s lullaby. It brings comfort and hope. Each time I hear the song, it calms me. In fact, I’ve collected every version of the song that’s been recorded. I currently have 15 versions on my iPhone. At my wedding, I danced [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:07:58-04:00June 22nd, 2015|Family, Grieving, Patrick|2 Comments

Connecting with Babyloss Mamas

For having the worst possible initiation, the Babyloss Club is filled with the most awe-inspiring and lovely people. This week I've done some networking for Pregnancy After Loss Support and gotten to learn more about two amazing families and connect with the mamas, who are doing great things in the loss world. I got to talk to [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:07:59-04:00June 11th, 2015|Crafting, Family, Patrick|0 Comments

Celebrating Baby E (and Patrick too!) with “Jesus Loves Me”

Last weekend my side of the family descended upon Wichita, Kansas for the baptism of my newest nephew, Baby E, who was born in November. Oh, how I love that little boy. He has brought so much joy to our family. He was a pleasant surprise, one that spurred uncharted territory for our entire family. [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:07:59-04:00May 28th, 2015|Family, Patrick|0 Comments

Patrick’s First Birthday: Celebrating with Ladybugs and Pie

Last week I wrote about the flower arrangements we took to the doctors and nurses who delivered Patrick, as well as the presents and handmade elements of his birthday celebration. Today I'll wrap up how we celebrated the day. I've known since I delivered Patrick that we'd celebrate him each year by eating Key Lime [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:08:16-04:00April 13th, 2015|Family, Patrick|0 Comments

Patrick’s First Birthday: The Presents

Reader’s Note: If you’re coming over from Crazy Mom Quilts, I want to give you a head’s up that this post talks about loss, specifically the celebration of the first birthday of my son, who was born still. If you are triggered by pregnancy loss, neonatal loss, or child loss, I will completely understand if you [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:08:16-04:00April 10th, 2015|Crafting, Family, Patrick|5 Comments

Patrick’s First Birthday: The Flowers

I wanted to write a recap of Patrick's birthday for the blog today, and as I started pulling everything together, I realized I had too much for one post. I continue to be amazed at how much space this little boy occupies, and not just in my heart. When I started his scrapbook, I figured [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:08:16-04:00April 6th, 2015|Family, Patrick|0 Comments


March 18th starts the countdown of the last few "firsts" of Patrick milestones. If the recent other firsts--Patrick's due date and Christmas--are any indication of what I can expect, the countdown, the anticipation of the milestone, proves far worse than the actual day. I can tell I'm in that zone. My anxiety is almost unbearable. I [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:08:27-04:00March 15th, 2015|Family, Patrick|3 Comments

What My Stillborn Son Taught Me About Love

Today is Patrick's first Valentine's Day. I should be dressing him in a probably-really-too-girly "Love Bug" onesie and showering him with love and snuggles. Instead, I've spent the last couple of weeks contemplating what he's taught me about love. Patrick has taught me so much--about loss, about grief, about strength, about survival--but I think the [...]

By |2018-02-13T10:30:16-04:00February 14th, 2015|Family, Life after Loss, Our Story, Patrick|1 Comment

Patrick’s First Christmas

We survived our first Christmas without Patrick, even experienced joy through the holiday, which we weren't sure was going to be possible. A big part of that survival was communicating our needs and making new traditions that include Patrick. I made a stocking for Patrick (actually, I made three stockings this year. I'll be posting [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:08:52-04:00January 3rd, 2015|Family, Patrick|2 Comments

Capture Your Grief – Day 1. Sunrise

Capture Your Grief Prompt: Day 1: SUNRISE. Let us honour the beginning of this healing month by waking up early to watch the sunrise wherever we in the world. This will be a beautifully, poignant way for us all to feel connected and energized for the month ahead. When you go outside to watch the sunrise this [...]

By |2016-10-13T17:09:23-04:00October 1st, 2014|Capture Your Grief Project, Grieving, Patrick|0 Comments
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